"This was the herb market"

...because in the past, vegetables were called herbs.


Here is France, primarily in photos.


Excursion 1:


We took a historic train ride through Montpellier.  This sign was posted at the front of the train:

Figure 6.1 - Please don't bring your fries or Olympic torches on this train.

The train wasn't really a train, but it had this at the front:

Figure 6.2:  LOLZ

We learned so much.  Like there are literally Arc de Triomphes/Triomfs all over the place.  Nice, Europe.


Excursion 2: Caverns AKA EPIC TRAVEL FAIL VOLUME 1


The Clamouse caverns were supposed to be "very easy" to get to without a car.  So we took a bus.  Hilariously, five minutes into the journey, the bus driver got off.  He just LEFT.  We'll never know where he went.  

Figure 6.3:  Where...are you going?

Our reactions:

Figure 6.4.1: Sadness

Figure 6.4.2: R U sirius?

We got off one stop past the caverns (idiotes).  When we went to the tourist info desk, the man there said "Not far, just down the road on your right."  Four kilometers later on the highway, we made it.  

Figure 6.5: We were actually walking on the highway.

The caves themselves were sweet.  During the tour, the guide turned off all the lights and put on a light show complete with opera singers in the background.

Figure 6.6:  Watch out Pink Floyd, Clamouse is coming for you. 

Excursion 3: Volleyball, Take 1


We literally stumbled onto a beach masters volleyball tournament in the city square.  Much more to come on this front later.


Excursion 4:


We decided to splurge and go on a wine tasting tour.  We thought we were signing up for a fancy, official wine tour.  We were...wrong.  But we still loved it.  A man in a saab with a baby seat in the back came and picked us up from our hotel at 10:30.  SURPRISE!!! SOLO TOUR!  Oh, and only one winery.  #Random


Our guide was the best....he was so funny and French. (Never thought I'd say that sentence) Obviously we took a picture of him and the wines.

Figure 6.7 - We didn't even get to try all of these.

Figure 6.8 - We're all so awkward.

Excursion 5:  Beach volleyball, for real.


We decided to go into town and watch the end of the tournament.  First, on the opposite side of the square, we found a stage with people performing to horror film music.

Figure 6.9 - What are you DOING?

Then, as we took our seats, this little guy walked up to watch the game.

Figure 6.10 - Jake Wischnia, is that you?

We ended up sitting with these hooligans from Brazil.  The video says it all.

Naturally, as always, they wanted to be our best friends.  They accomplished this by descretely putting beers next to us.  Eventually we took them.

Figure 6.11 - Whatchya lookin at, guy in white tank top??!

Beach masters, by the numbers:

Kisses on the cheek - 6/person

Professions of love - 3

Times chanting "Alice" and "Uhhmanda" - 3

Creepy Frenchman talking to us -1

Free beers consumed - 7

Brazil victories - 2 

Times asked to dance - 4

Times asked to skip Switzerland and live with them in their Montpillier home - 3

Ah Brazil, you are hilarious.

Trip Revelations:

1. We literally had a world war that spanned three countries.

Figure 6.12 - One of two double wars.  Alice was victorious in the end. (For now...)

2.  French think...oddly... of Americans and our restaurants.  This was their take on our deserts:

Figure 6.13: It's American because there are two on the plate.

Figure 6.14: Could you BE any more stereotypically "Western"?

3. Countries where you have to pay fifty cents to use the bathroom = bad news bears for Alice.  The worst news bears in fact.  Probably a grizzly bear actually.

4.  French railways ARE murder mysteries.  These two noises were played right after each other all throughout the country.  Turn down your volume, we wouldn't want to startle you.

5.  The French dont think they can speak English.  They can.

6. Europeans think things aren't far away.  They are.

7.  Finaly, Europe loves real sugar.

Figure 6.15: The French are honest people

Au revoir France. Suhp Switzerland?